Wednesday, December 06, 2006

Rearing a Psychokiller

Some say that a dog grows to resemble his owners. If this is true of Pappy and us, then my wife and I must be flat-out stark raving mental.

Case in point-- give him one of his big biscuits, and he will wander in circles around the house whining. We let him outside so he can bury it (anything to stop the whining), but that isn't what he wants. Then he brings it back in, drops it on the rug, and jumps around barking at it. Then he wants to play fetch with it while whining. As near as I can tell, this will go on forever until I break it in half-- whereupon he gobbles it right down. I've figured out he must have a complex about treats longer than four inches, because he does the same thing with dried chicken strips and pizzles but not smaller treats.

I blame all of this on my wife. She was given an Easy-Bake Oven as a child. She loved it, but she was terrified of using it lest she use up all of its little cake mixes. Her parents thought she wasn't interested in it, and finally gave it away. She still hasn't recovered. If they knew all this background, the shelter would never have given us a dog.


Studly Dudley said...

Dear Pappy and Pappy Sr.,

What a funny story!! My Mum wanted an Easy Bake Oven too.. but now she realizes how lacking in nutrition a meal must be if it has to be cooked by a lightbulb. I wish she would get one now and make me cookies in them.
By the by, I love your Band Aid video! I saw it on Buster's site and had to come here to give you a woof and holler. It had me in stitches, I was so delighted.. you're very talented, monsieur.


Pappy's Fella said...

Well, on the whole question of nutritional content of lightbulb cooking-- I remember playing with Incredible Edibles as a kid. There's not much that could be less nutritious than colored corn syrup grilled into the shapes of snakes and frogs.

Sunshade said...

Hi Pappy's dad,

Ok, I understand the big bone biscuit syndrome, but I can't believe Pappy will whine and jump around if a piece of chicken strip is over 4 inches!!!!! That would be in my tummy in under 2 seconds!! (I do the whining afterwards..)

Love nibbles,
Miss Sunshade

Tin Tin Blogdog said...

Hmmmm, I have no problem with length, width, height, depth, volume etc of treats.

They all end up the same way (ultimately out my rear end in a satisfying lump of warm stuff).

Pappy may be of a more delicate constitution. Ummmm, on second thoughts, no. Not given the stories you've told already.

Okay, maybe he just wants to show you up and is hoping social services/RSPCA will hop along sometime soon and see his behaviour and then they'll look at you really funnily and then...

Okay, forget that too.

I dunno. I'm going to eat my treat now. Oh, I already did.

Chow for now,

Tin Tin xo

Pappy's Fella said...

Tin Tin and Sunshade, The strange thing is once he takes the first nibble, it's gone. It just takes a long time to get to that first nibble. If we had a second dog in the house, I bet he'd do a lot less soul-searching before getting down to business.

Adam said...

Texas is more sane than his Dad.

Texas's Dad.

Karen said...

Diet coke just came fountaining out from my nose.